Wednesday, November 17, 2004

Time to Examine the Bible

I happen to have a copy of the Bible right next to my computer, for some reason, so let's take a look:

Leviticus 24: 13

"The Lord said to Moses, "Take that man out of the camp. Everyone who heard him curse shall put his hands on the man's head to testif that he is guilty, and then teh whole community shall stone him to death."

That REALLY fits in with God's "Thou shall not kill" commandment.

Sunday, November 14, 2004

Theology Wars: The Eli Strikes Back

Last time I was going all holier than though on Leviticus. You know what? Leviticus is old law. You know what that means, right? We don't listen to it anymore. It means that it does not matter, that we do not follow it's teachings, that we don't care what happens in it, that it is moot, that it is total bull... Not that we didn't already know that.

Could anyone tell me the new laws? I really am curious as to what they are, because then I could bash them. Help would be appreciated.

Now then, off to ridicule? Splendid! Well, howabout those ten commandments? Good rules, right? Thou Shalt Not Kill is my favorite. It's so easy to understand, so very basic, so very "Hey, you shouldn't do that. Knock that shit off."

Then why does God do it?

Not to mention, why are there so many things that say to do it?

The actual quote is (Exodus 12:23 I think) "Thou Shalt Not Kill" which is (through literal translation -lo tirtzack[Lo meaning "Thou Shalt Not" and tirtzack meaning "Kill Anything"]-) "You will not kill anything to speak of" which is silly, because they ate meat. An interesting note is how in the garden of Eden everyone and everything was herbivorous, but after the fall man and animal began to eat meat.

Wait...why are animals punished? Not to mention, we have found thousands of carnivorous or omnivorous animal fossils far prior to human fossils. That doesn't make sense, does it? I should note that Christians who think that Satan put fossils there are stupid.

Saturday, November 13, 2004

After Much Deliberation, I've Decided That Christianity Is Crack

Dangerous crack, that is. Christianity's sole purpose is to exist so that people will have something to do. Hell, honestly, it's like an obsessive hobby. Therefore the following reforms are necessary:

1. The Church shall never ever enter politics. Ever. There is a reason for the seperation of church and state, and if it does not happen, there will be no more church.

2. The Church may voice its policies, but it must not banish those who hold different views about nonreligious matters. This was why the Protestant Reformation began. They are doing it again on another level and it must be stopped.

3. The Pope must not be so old. This one I added because people remember things in 3.

Thursday, November 11, 2004

Call for Religeous Reformation

Times have changed since the first religeous reformation. I'm here to call for the second.

At first, it was all good. Really. The Pope had money, he had great power. None were too abusive, and voila, life was good. That was until the church started to become corrupt. The church started to sell so called, "pardons," or, "indulgences," in order to attain more money for their religeous statues and buildings. That was when the first reformation started. Luther wrote the 95 thesis about it. Calvin put up his own ideas. Both were casted out as a heretic.In time, the reformation happened, and things were good again.

If I ever go through with this, and my site gets traffic, in time, I will also become the same as Luther, Calvin, and those people. This site will be forbidden, and if the owner of blogger is highly religeous, it may be taken down. That however, is only if this is taken correctly, and that is in the extreme case.

Disregarding that, after the first reformation, times were good again. People had money, the church had lost their power, and money was given to the people who knew what was best for the country (such as Queen Elizebeth).

Now things have changed. Many things. That was just something about it.

First thing that must be changed, is the entire religeon itself. The jewish people say eating pigs and shellfish is a bad thing. However, there is a reason to that. Yes my friend, I said reason. If you go to a pig slaughter house, you will see living parasites swimming around on the floor which is filled up to your ankle in a pig's body fluids. Yes, disgusting. Pigs are very very disgusting. The Jews figured that out, but couldn't figure out how to cook a pig properly. Therefore, they did something that was for the good of the people. Said you can't eat pork. Same thing with shellfish. The Asians ate shellfish without a problem. That is only because the Asians knew how to cook shellfish.

The Christian religion needs major reformatting. First thing is that translate the bible correctly damnit. JESUS WALKED BY WATER, NOT ON WATER. Ok? The number 666 isn't the number of the anti-christ. It's a Roman's governers name added together.

Same thing with the muslim religeoun. Its 42 WHITE GRAPES, not virgins. Get that straight. The translation needs some work.

Second, is alot of clarification. It seems as if the Christian population takes the bible in a way that is so unforseen, it's ridiculous. Clarify the Bible, Tora, and the Old Testament.

Third, get the people to actually read the bible. The entire bible. Not go to church and balance your checkbook, or go to sleep, make them read the Bible. There was a reason why we have the printer here. It is so we can read. And reading your religeous book is the most important thing in a religeon.

Finally, please do not involve the church into politics and science in any way. If that is what we want to do, the church has no say in it. It's not suppose to, there's a seperation between the church and state. Basically, stop voting for things that the church tells you to. Do some research first, and then vote what you think is right.

Those are the reforms which are important. Without them, we have difficulties in the world. We went through one religeon reform, why can't we go through another? Educated the people, the world has changed, we have things here that they didn't back then.

Call another religeous reformation!

Wednesday, November 10, 2004

The stupidity of Americans

Ok. We have three major things to worry about being a politicians. Stem cell research, abortion, and homosexuality. We all know that Bush is anti all. And Kerry is pro all, unless stated otherwise among a Christian audiance. Well, that brings me to one question. Why is it such a big deal?

So what if it says, homosexuality is a sin by your bishop (not bible, I'll explain later).

It's not really a big deal. The big deal is about the war on Iraq and whether or not we should institute a draft. The big deal is how we are going to get out of our major debt Geroge Bush as accumulated. These my friend, are stuff the common folks of America should worry about. We should worry about tax cuts, the draft, etc. You get the point.

But hey, it is a big deal. The Christians certainly think so. It doesn't even say that in the bible. Let me explain. There is a part of the bible where the Christians think it says homosexuality is a sin. So the story goes, angles come down, and the town wants to have a big orgy with them. In other words, the gang rape from hell. Well, the leader of the city (mayor) says, "No, I will give up one of my daughters if you don't rape the angels." So his daughter is gang raped, and the angels fly away happly ever after.

Moral of the story: I'm pretty sure it's LETS NOT RAPE ANGELS LESS WE FACE THE WRATH OF GOD.

Whats worse, most Americans are more ignorant with the bible than me. Seriously. I'm atheist/agnostic here. I flip flop. I'm sure as hell not Christian/Catholic, or whatever. I know that the first commandment is, "Thou shall not place any god before me." It is not, "thou shall not kill."

Then we come to the commandment where it states, "Thou shall respect thy parents." The big thing is, why the hell do we have retirement homes then? They like beat old people and feed them slop. Its basically like a way to get rid of your parents while their going to DIE.

Ok, so lets avoid the Christian topic and move onto the red states.

"We drink fine french wine. You drink budwiser."
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2004/11/07/blue_state_to_reds/

Thats true. Us blue's don't like cheap booze. We like good vodka. We like good wine. Why? Because we have more money. Were better educated, were better fed, and we feed our kids Ridalin and Prozac to keep them happy (less your like me, who only needs rides from here and there and doesn't ask for much).

I mean, the red states are manipulated by Blue republicans. A.k.A Filthy rich people who say, "vote bush for the bible!" *cough* more taxcuts for more money *cough*.

I mean, stupid reds for not realizing this.

And lets just lightly touch on the topic of Bush.
YOU DO NOT LOWER TAXES DURING A WAR
YOU DO NOT LOWER FUNDINGS FOR SCIENTIFIC RESEARCH
OIL WILL RUN OUT
AND BY ALL MEANS, DONT JUST TEACH ABSTENENCE IN SCHOOL UNLESS YOU WANT SOME MORE PREGNANT TEENAGERS.

Look at the blues. We don't have as many teen pregnancys. But the reds? Their all stupid enough to think, "lets not teach kids about condoms and lets teach them to have sex after marraige."

Doesn't work that way. Teenagers are horny by nature. We weren't originally supposed to live past the age of 40.

And yet, we have people who don't believe that. We have people who believe in creation even though if that was true, we would be so fucking inbred it would be pathetic. Oh, maybe the reds are. The majority of them have an IQ lower than 100 (average cutline).

They don't believe that homosexuality is just a genetic trait. Why? Because their small minds can't comprehend something past their propagandic religeon. I mean, I can accept all of this. Why? I'm not very religeous if religeous at all.

The bible is just a book of MORALS. THEY TEACH US ABOUT MORALS OK!?!?!?

I mean, people who voted for Bush are either incredibly rich, or incredibly stupid. They can't comprehend science. The rich can, but their the republicans who just punked you out of all your money.

If the blues broke off from the reds, the reds would collapse. The blues are self sustainable. The reds would degrade into complete chaos. Its that or pure farmland. And thats just stupid.

The majority of Americans are stupid. We like propaganda. We like little things that have no meaning at all. We like Bush.

I don't.
I know who to vote for.

The reds are supported by the blues. We might as well let the blue's do all the voting because we all have the internet and are educated.

Eli is back, with knowledge! Hide!

Howdy everyone. It's Eli, back again. Miss me? Radical post Roger, got my blood moving, and here I am! Where shall we get started? I noticed a little mention of homosexuality. Golly, this is going to be fun.

So, what do Christians (RadCons) have against homosexuality? We're all familiar with Leviticus, right? "You shall not lay in be with a man as with a woman; that is an abomination." is a rather famous line. Right? Right. First of all, I can bring up the infamous line of "It messed up in translation" but that is simply too easy. Time to bring out the big guns... they're not that big, shutup... right, so it says you can't lay in bed with a man as you would with a woman, because it's an abomination. Apparently, so is planting more than one crop in a field. Leviticus 19:19(Leviticus is crazy man!). Does that mean farmers are going to hell for so minor a sin? Or are all abominations major? Is there a different level of abomination? Is homosexuality a major abomination, while eating shell fish is a minor abomination? (Leviticus 11:10. That crazy Leviticus!). I like oysters, personally. They are the only animal I eat nowadays. Rarely at that.

Enough talk of food.

*cough cough Levitivus 11:6-8 says touching dead pig makes you unclean cough cough*

Sorry, tickle in my throat. A cough. Totally innocent. Honest.

I side tracked a bit, sorry. So, back to homosexuality? Cool.

As far as I can tell, homosexuality is a sin for the same reason that anything else is a sin. For the reason of God not liking it, and it being an abomination. Sucks for me, I can't even eat oysters without being damned. Not to mention if I cut the hair around my temples, God forbid! (really. God does forbid. Leviticus 19:27, if you're curious.) Also, apparently (through serious studying...on a forum. Took me five minutes, seriously. Can't you guys do this by yourselves?) the reason why homosexuality is forbidden is because (get this) you can't pro-create. Guess what! We can nowadays. Yeah, that's right. We can pro-create! We can take a woman's egg cell and turn it into a sperm! We can take a sperm and turn it into an egg! Isn't this incredible? This feeling..it's warm and tingly..it feels like logic!

Christians must not feel that very often.

I am sure I forgot something. Oh, yeah! Mental process! We all know how people find people of the opposite gender attractive due to chemicals in the brain. Yea? It is (furthermore) thoroughly proven that the same happens with homosexuals. Turn opposite to same, though.

Ever notice how they always rant against male homosexuals? What happened to lesbians? Gee, chauvenism AND social bias! What a world we live in.

Evil Raddies

Radcons are evil people. Very evil. Um Yeah. Radal Conservatives...

Radacal conservatives are mostly Christian.

Anyways.

Radcons are the people who are destroying the US. Such as the thought of War on Terrorism. We have spent over 10 billion dollars on that stupid war. What we could have done with that money is increase our education, bolster our military strength, etc. You get the point (if not, your a dumbass). That is just one thing. Something big, but it's only one thing.

Other stuff Radcons believe in is an economical system. One of which is giving all the money to RICH people, hoping they will make companies and provide jobs. One problem, they are already filthy rich. Second, you do that, and they will be richer. We need to spend money on the lower class.

Radal conservatives have done numerous things which are, BAD. Such as the teaching of Abstenince in Texas. Um hello? You have the highest teen pregnancy rate in the entire United States. You dumb schmuck.

Bush (a radcon himself) has also done many things against the people of the United States. Such as taking money out of the Veterans medical funds, stem cell research, Aids (we'll just teach abstenince), etc. Well then, thats a stupid thing to do isn't it? PLUS he did a tax cut (again, for the rich people). What does the tax cut mean? It means were in DEBT due to the war with Iraq. You don't go to war and lower taxes at the same time. That's just not something you want to do. Bush seinor did it the right way, he RAISED taxes during the war. AND he got Saudi Arabia to pay for some of it. Bush Seinor == good thinking. Bush Junior == WTF WERE YOU ON!?! OPIUM?

These are also the people who want, "under god," in the pledge, and want prayer taught in school. Well, your Christian. You want Christian stuff. What about all of us who don't believe in your religeon? Damn us all to hell? Piss off. I'm not going to be the one who prays during school. Thats even a violation of a Bill of Right (under god would qualify). Do your research if you want to know.

Homosexuality, a big topic when it comes to Radcons. "NO THEY ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MARRY EACH OTHER!" Well, I for one says, "let them do what they want." Maybe IF you didn't get all these special benifits from marriages, I would be on your side (protection of religeon). But no, with all the special benifits of marrying, it changes everything. You see, they want it too. If there weren't any special benifits, those homosexual people would just say nothing and live together.

Us Liberals, are not femminazis, tree huggers, satan's messengers, people who will destroy the US. Ironically, we are trying to keep everything FAIR (Radical conservatives don't believe in equal rights).

It's suppose to be the Liberals who are trying to find every loop hole in the rights. Its suppose to be the conservatives who try to close them. Erm, let me think. Its OPPOSITE.

Radcon Congressmen are the people who took money out of the IRS. What does that mean? All the rich guys can now CHEAT the goverment with tax evasion (multiple identities). Now they have more money, now the country has less, and now were in MORE debt.

So, what does this mean? Is this just some random rant about Radcons? Actually, I'm here telling you want NOT to become. If you are already one (for all you, "GOO BUSH BECUASE OF THIS this this...") go get a vial of arsen and drink it. You are the people who are killing the US. Not us. If you don't want to drink arsen, then don't. I can't force you to do anything. I'm just stating why being a radcon is a bad thing.


So maybe you say your not a radcon. You are a radcon when you believe in several things such as...
1. VOTE BUSH!
2. WAR ON TERRORISM
3. ALWAYS USE OIL
4. NO STEM CELL RESEARCH
5. NO ABORTION
6. RELIGEON IN SCHOOL
7. NO GAY MARRAGES
8. LETS TAKE OVER IRAQ TO STOP TERRORISM
9. LETS CUT TAXES
10. NO EQUAL RIGHTS.
11. LETS NOT BAN SUVS!!!

If you find you believe in MOST of the topics listed above, you are a RADCON. Highly ignorant, arrogant, stupid, bible thumpers, YOU GET THE POINT.

Btw, Homosexuality is genetics. Kids raised by gay parents will not be gay.

Lesson to be learned: Don't become a radcon, you will only destroy the already mangled US (Damn you Bush).